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♥ Wednesday, October 5, 2011

Today, the person who manage to whirl my mind was none other than Atika. She called me when i was on the circle line asking me what was so important that i can forgo outings with Xin Rong like that. I remained silent as i really don't know how to answer her question. Xin Rong is very disappointed. I know right? I know that she is upset since yesterday when she used that tone to text me back. I apologized but she said used to it. yeah that proven what a jerk i am. But what can i do except for making her happy on Friday? Does she even wants to see me on friday? I think she hates me till she doesn't wanna see me anymore already la.. Thought that they will scold me, but they never. That made me even more guilty. I know things are wrong. But i really don't know how to make them right. I miss them. But saying this make me a perfect jerk. Actually i am a heartless and irresponsible girlfriend who cannot even keep promises to outings with my girls. Seriously i don't deserve any girls to be with me anymore. I'm not deserving of any girlfriends with me. They are really unlucky to the max to have me this kind of take aviation and R more important than them. I suck to the core. Seriously suck to the core. They should just cut all contacts with me, because they are really awesome girls who don't deserve this type of treatment. She stood by me when i need someone the most, when he left me in the cold.I suck to the max treating someone who treat me with her entire heart. I think i so totally disappoint her and broke her heart. I really really feel so guilty. She was always there. But i always left her for him. i deserve to lose this moon man.. I cannot even sleep last night. Don't even have appetite for dinner today. Think i will skip dinner and drink some water just rest in for the day. Haix..


Wednesday, October 05, 2011